How to Improve Teens Self-Esteem

How to Improve Teens Self-Esteem Adolescence is a crucial stage in the life of your child. As a parent, you have the challenge of guiding them toward a happy, responsible adulthood. There is good reason to be worried, with all the changes and challenges confronting them. Though the majority of teens can successfully sail through adolescence, a significant number end up stalled or sidetracked along the way. Some barely make it through. A confident teen with a strong sense of self-worth or healthy self-esteem has a bigger chance of succeeding in life. They may, however, need some help to have a fulfilling adolescence and stable preparation for the next stage of life. If you want to help your child achieve their dreams, it is proactive to supplement your parental care with professional assistance. Why Is Your Teen Unhappy? The Developing Teen Seeing your child groping through the teen years can result in your feeling helpless. You may wonder why they have no friends hanging around your home on the weekends or why they seem uninterested in social events. Could they be suffering from poor self-esteem? Having healthy self-esteem isnt everything, but it can be a good start in negotiating adolescence. In this age of booming telecommunication miracles (the Internet, computers, satellites, etc.), it is easy for teens to develop a poor self-image by comparing themselves to what they perceive as ideal-clear skin, a body with the right measurements, beautiful and bouncy tresses, etc. Despite knowing that nobodys perfect and even famous beauties have flaws, they may still feel inadequate, unlovable, and unworthy. It has nothing to do with their appearance, weight, or popularity. With low self-worth, they will always find something unacceptable or inadequate about themselves. Teens are vulnerable to poor self-worth because they are in the middle of a transition. Their hormones are shifting and raging, their brain connections are wired differently, and they are incessantly challenged academically and socially. While all these problems are natural, it is not healthy to leave your teen unguided. Adolescence is also a stage when they can be reckless with their actions and decisions. It is important to be supportive, but more important to help them develop healthy self-esteem. Self-Esteem in the Eyes of Teens Self-esteem is the value that an individual gives themselves based on their perceived worth to others and the world in general. It isnt static, but changes throughout life. It is typically most unstable during adolescence and during major life transitions. According to Understanding Teenagers, adolescence is a time of life when a persons self-esteem is known to fluctuate significantly. It is estimated that up to a half of adolescents will struggle with low self-esteem, many of these occurrences during the early teen years. For a teen in search of identity, low self-esteem can harm budding relationships, trust in others, their ability to achieve their dreams, and their happiness. Unfortunately, improving your childs view of themselves and their abilities can be a real challenge, because the issue is complicated by their tendency to measure their worth in terms of their looks. There are several important predictors of an adolescents self-esteem: transitions, social stability, and the most influential-appearance. A number of studies have revealed that there is a strong correlation between teenagers who express dissatisfaction with their appearance and those who have low level of self-esteem. The correlation is even stronger among teenage girls as a response to the social pressures generated by the media about what is perfect or ideal. What Your Teens Body Language Says about Low Self-Esteem How do you know if your teen has good self-esteem? An adolescent with positive self-esteem is confident, positive, responsible, trusting, and independent but cooperative, with a good sense of self-direction and control. Other signs include consciousness of their strengths, the ability to say no, and the ability to accept their limitations and shortcomings, resolve their issues, and manage their feelings. Conversely, poor self-esteem can outwardly manifest in being perpetually negative and critical of themselves, perfectionism, and fear of being scoffed at. They will not make decisions, fearing risks or blame for any untoward repercussion. They feel unloved and inadequate, and they are always suspicious of people and their intentions. Some of the observable signs of poor self-worth that you would want to note are pervasive insecurity shown by walking or talking with their heads down to avoid eye contact, being self-critical, using negative statements about themselves, and perpetually apologizing. Wanting to elevate their perceived status, they may tease others, gossip, or engage in name-calling. They may also attract attention by talking loudly, bragging, or using excessive gestures. If this is your teen, get their symptoms assessed-the sooner, the better. Supplementing Parental Care with Counseling There is nothing better than raising your child in a loving and supportive environment. Be aware, however, that it cant guarantee that your teen will have a perfect life or that you can fix all their issues. There is a world outside your home and there are influences beyond your control. Nevertheless, you can make it easier for your child to enjoy their adolescence. With the right help from a counselor contracted with Carolina Counseling Services in Sanford, NC, to supplement your care, it is achievable. A teens self-esteem is like a roller-coaster ride-there will be ups and downs. This is normal. While many teenagers can handle the stage on their own, they may need help when the going gets tough. With the help of an experienced counselor independently contracted with Carolina Counseling Services in Sanford, NC, your child can realize their full potential and grow into a responsible and independent adult who learns from their mistakes. When your child becomes too hard on themselves because they arent slimmer, fairer, smarter, or more in fashion, be there for them to affirm their worth. If their reaction is extreme to the point of obsession, try to understand them and find help so they can develop healthy self-acceptance and self-worth. This is how a CCS-contracted therapist can help.ÂÂ   Call now for an appointment!

Invent Your Own Technology :: Process Essays

Invent Your Own Technology â€Å"The first writing technology was writing itself (39 Baron).† -Dennis Baron, From Pencils to Pixels Re-introducing myself to a task that I have taken advantage of my entire life proved both frustrating and time consuming. Writing has always been done with at least a pencil hasn’t it? Apparently not, and I realized that as I set out to â€Å"create† a non-technological way to write. The new way of writing I created, although effective, took quite a bit longer than I had anticipated. Thinking of an idea for this project was easy; it was putting that abstract thought into concrete form that proved difficult. Armed with the best of intentions I set out to create a project equivalent to Egyptian hieroglyphics carved on the tops of pyramids. I soon realized that I set my goals a bit to high so I began scratching a few words into a piece of tree bark with a rock. When that proved not as interesting as I wanted, and certainly not as aesthetically pleasing, I moved to plan B: creating my own ink by boiling grape peals. The ink was a deep shade of purple (and smelled like w ine); I was sure it would write just like ink from a pen and I would have a beautiful project. However my ego got the better of me. As it turned out the fermented ink would not write on my bark surface. Instead it absorbed into the bark never to be seen again. I moved to plan C. Creating a smoother surface for my wonderful ink by mixing flour and water and spreading it over the bark-again unsuccessful. Plan D: stick with the flour and water mixture but carve into the surface, like clay, before it hardens completely. (I had utterly given up on the ink.) Success! I had finally created a new way to write. In just over three hours I had a ten-word document. It wasn’t profound; it wasn’t beautiful; but it was certainly permanent. My creation came to life. Through this inventing process I was not only able to make a new writing technology, but I also learned something very valuable about myself-I have surprisingly little patients.

A Clean, Well-Lighted Place by Ernest Hemingway Essay

An old man sits alone at night in a cafà ©. He is deaf and likes when the night grows still. Two waiters watch the old man carefully because they know he won’t pay if he gets too drunk. One waiter tells the other that the old man tried to kill himself because he was in despair. The other waiter asks why he felt despair, and the first waiter says the reason was â€Å"nothing† because the man has a lot of money. The waiters look at the empty tables and the old man, who sits in the shadow of a tree. They see a couple walk by, a soldier with a girl. One of the waiters says the soldier had better be careful about being out because the guards just went by. The old man taps his glass against its saucer and asks the younger waiter for a brandy. The younger waiter tells him he’ll get drunk, then goes back and tells the older waiter that the old man will stay all night. The younger waiter says he never goes to bed earlier than 3 a.m. and that the old man should have killed himself. He takes the old man his brandy. As he pours it, he tells the old man that he should have killed himself, but the old man just indicates that he wants more brandy in the glass. The younger waiter tells the older waiter that the old man is drunk, then asks again why he tried to kill himself. The older waiter says he doesn’t know. The younger waiter asks how he did it. The older waiter says he tried to hang himself and his niece found him and got him down. The younger waiter asks why she got him down, and the older waiter says they were concerned about his soul. The waiters speculate on how much money the old man has and decide he’s probably age eighty. The younger waiter says he wishes the old man would leave so that he can go home and go to bed with his wife. The older waiter says that the old man was married at one time. The younger waiter says a wife wouldn’t do him any good, but the older waiter disagrees. The younger waiter points out that the old man has his niece, then says he doesn’t want to be an old man. The older waiter points out that the old man is clean and drinks neatly. The younger waiter says again that he wishes the old man would leave. The old man indicates that he wants another brandy, but the younger waiter tells him they’re closing. The old man pays and walks away. The older waiter asks the younger waiter why he didn’t let him drink more because it’s not even 3 a.m. yet, and the younger waiter says he wants to go home. The older waiter says an hour doesn’t make much difference. The younger waiter says that the old man can just drink at home, but the older waiter says it’s different. The younger waiter agrees. The older waiter jokingly asks if the younger waiter is afraid to go home early. The younger waiter says he has confidence. The older waiter points out that he also has youth and a job, whereas the older waiter has only a job. The older waiter says that he likes to stay at cafà ©s very late with the others who are reluctant to go home and who need light during the nighttime. The younger waiter says he wants to go home, and the older waiter remarks that they are very different. The older waiter says he doesn’t like to close the cafà © in case someone needs it. The younger waiter says there are bars to go to, but the older waiter says that the cafà © is clean and well lit. They wish each other good night. The older waiter continues thinking to himself about how important it is for a cafà © to be clean and well lit. He thinks that music is never good to have at a cafà © and that standing at a bar isn’t good either. He wonders what he’s afraid of, deciding it’s not fear but just a familiar nothing. He says two prayers but substitutes â€Å"nada† (Spanish for â€Å"nothing†) for most of the words. When he arrives at a bar, he orders a drink and tells the bartender that the bar isn’t clean. The bartender offers another drink, but the waiter leaves. He doesn’t like bars, preferring cafà ©s. He knows that he will now go home and fall asleep when the sun comes up. He thinks he just has insomnia, a common problem. Character Analysis The Old Man – A deaf man who likes to drink at the cafà © late into the night. The old man likes the shadows of the leaves on the well-lit cafà © terrace. Rumor has it that he tried to hang himself, he was once married, he has a lot of money, and his niece takes care of him. He often gets drunk at the cafà © and leaves without paying. The Older Waiter – A compassionate man who understands why the old man may want to stay late at the cafà ©. The older waiter enjoys staying late at cafà ©s as well. He thinks it’s very important for a cafà © to be clean and well lit, and he sees the cafà © as a refuge from despair. Rather than admit that he is lonely, he tells himself that he has insomnia. Like the old man, the older waiter likes to stay late at cafà ©s, and he understands on a deep level why they are both reluctant to go home at night. He tries to explain it to the younger waiter by saying, â€Å"He stays up because he likes it,† but the younger waiter dismisses this and says that the old man is lonely. Indeed, both the old man and the older waiter are lonely. The old man lives alone with only a niece to look after him, and we never learn what happened to his wife. He drinks alone late into the night, getting drunk in cafà ©s. The older waiter, too, is lonely. He lives alone and makes a habit of staying out late rather than going home to bed. But there is more to the older waiter’s â€Å"insomnia,† as he calls it, than just loneliness. An unnamed, unspecified malaise seems to grip him. This malaise is not â€Å"a fear or dread,† as the older waiter clarifies to himself, but an overwhelming feeling of nothingness—an existential angst about his place in the universe and an uncertainty about the meaning of life. Whereas other people find meaning and comfort in religion, the older waiter dismisses religion as â€Å"nada†Ã¢â‚¬â€nothing. The older waiter finds solace only in clean, well-lit cafà ©s. There, life seems to make sense. The older waiter recognizes himself in the old man and sees his own future. He stands up for the old man against the younger waiter’s criticisms, pointing out that the old man might benefit from a wife and is clean and neat when he drinks. The older waiter has no real reason to take the old man’s side. In fact, the old man sometimes leaves the cafà © without paying. But the possible reason for his support becomes clear when the younger waiter tells the older waiter that he talks like an old man too. The older waiter is aware that he is not young or confident, and he knows that he may one day be just like the old man—unwanted, alone, and in despair. Ultimately, the older waiter is reluctant to close the cafà © as much for the old man’s sake as for his own because someday he’ll need someone to keep a cafà © open late for him. The Younger Waiter – An impatient young man who cares only about getting home to his wife. The younger waiter is usually irritated with the old man because he must stay late and serve him drinks. He does not seem to care why the old man stays so long. His only concern is leaving as quickly as possible. Brash and insensitive, the younger waiter can’t see beyond himself. He readily admits that he isn’t lonely and is eager to return home where his wife is waiting for him. He doesn’t seem to care that others can’t say the same and doesn’t recognize that the cafà © is a refuge for those who are lonely. The younger waiter is immature and says rude things to the old man because he wants to close the cafà © early. He seems unaware that he won’t be young forever or that he may need a place to find solace later in life too. Unlike the older waiter, who thinks deeply—perhaps too deeply—about life and those who struggle to face it, the younger waiter demonstrates a dismissive attitude toward human life in general. For example, he says the old man should have just gone ahead and killed himself and says that he â€Å"wouldn’t want to be that old.† He himself has reason to live, and his whole life is ahead of him. â€Å"You have everything,† the older waiter tells him. The younger waiter, immersed in happiness, doesn’t really understand that he is lucky, and he therefore has little compassion or understanding for those who are lonely and still searching for meaning in their lives. Themes Life as Nothingness In â€Å"A Clean, Well-Lighted Place,† Hemingway suggests that life has no meaning and that man is an insignificant speck in a great sea of nothingness. The older waiter makes this idea as clear as he can when he says, â€Å"It was all a nothing and man was a nothing too.† When he substitutes the Spanish word nada (nothing) into the prayers he recites, he indicates that religion, to which many people turn to find meaning and purpose, is also just nothingness. Rather than pray with the actual words, â€Å"Our Father who art in heaven,† the older waiter says, â€Å"Our nada who art in nada†Ã¢â‚¬â€effectively wiping out both God and the idea of heaven in one breath. Not everyone is aware of the nothingness, however. For example, the younger waiter hurtles through his life hastily and happily, unaware of any reason why he should lament. For the old man, the older waiter, and the other people who need late-night cafà ©s, however, th e idea of nothingness is overwhelming and leads to despair. The Struggle to Deal with Despair The old man and older waiter in â€Å"A Clean, Well-Lighted Place† struggle to find a way to deal with their despair, but even their best method simply subdues the despair rather than cures it. The old man has tried to stave off despair in several unsuccessful ways. We learn that he has money, but money has not helped. We learn that he was once married, but he no longer has a wife. We also learn that he has unsuccessfully tried to commit suicide in a desperate attempt to quell the despair for good. The only way the old man can deal with his despair now is to sit for hours in a clean, well-lit cafà ©. Deaf, he can feel the quietness of the nighttime and the cafà ©, and although he is essentially in his own private world, sitting by himself in the cafà © is not the same as being alone. The older waiter, in his mocking prayers filled with the word nada, shows that religion is not a viable method of dealing with despair, and his solution is the same as the old man’s: he waits out the nighttime in cafà ©s. He is particular about the type of cafà © he likes: the cafà © must be well lit and clean. Bars and bodegas, although many are open all night, do not lessen despair because they are not clean, and patrons often must stand at the bar rather than sit at a table. The old man and the older waiter also glean solace from routine. The ritualistic cafà ©-sitting and drinking help them deal with despair because it makes life predictable. Routine is something they can control and manage, unlike the vast nothingness that surrounds them. Motif Loneliness Loneliness pervades â€Å"A Clean, Well-Lighted Place† and suggests that even though there are many people struggling with despair, everyone must struggle alone. The deaf old man, with no wife and only a niece to care for him, is visibly lonely. The younger waiter, frustrated that the old man won’t go home, defines himself and the old man in opposites: â€Å"He’s lonely. I’m not lonely.† Loneliness, for the younger waiter, is a key difference between them, but he gives no thought to why the old man might be lonely and doesn’t consider the possibility that he may one day be lonely too. The older waiter, although he doesn’t say explicitly that he is lonely, is so similar to the old man in his habit of sitting in cafà ©s late at night that we can assume that he too suffers from loneliness. The older waiter goes home to his room and lies in bed alone; telling himself that he merely suffers from sleeplessness. Even in this claim, however, he instinctively reaches out for company, adding, â€Å"Many must have it.† The thought that he is not alone in having insomnia or being lonely comforts him. Symbols The Cafà © The cafà © represents the opposite of nothingness: its cleanliness and good lighting suggest order and clarity, whereas nothingness is chaotic, confusing, and dark. Because the cafà © is so different from the nothingness the older waiter describes, it serves as a natural refuge from the despair felt by those who are acutely aware of the nothingness. In a clean, brightly lit cafà ©, despair can be controlled and even temporarily forgotten. When the older waiter describes the nothingness that is life, he says, â€Å"It was only that and light was all it needed and a certain cleanness and order.† The light it in the sentence is never defined, but we can speculate about the waiter’s meaning: although life and man are nothing, light, cleanliness, and order can serve as substance. They can help stave off the despair that comes from feeling completely unanchored to anyone or anything. As long as a clean, well-lighted cafà © exists, despair can be kept i n check. A Clean, Well-Lighted Place by Ernest Hemingway Essay 1. A Clean Well-Lighted Place 2. In the short story A Clean Well-Lighted Place written by Ernest Hemingway in 1933, there are three characters that are defined by light.   First there is the elderly gentleman who is a customer in the bar.   He regularly comes to the bar to get drunk while he sits in the shadows of the leaves of a tree.   This man has lived a long life and has known much pain.   In fact he has known enough pain that he has tried to commit suicide. The two waiters inside the cafe knew that the old man was a little drunk, and while he was a good client they knew that if he became too drunk he would leave without paying, so they kept watch on him. â€Å"Last week he tried to commit suicide,† one waiter said. (Hemingway)   He drinks to dull his pain of loss and pain.   The shadows are symbolic of all of his bead memories clumped together and the leaves that through tiny shadows to hide him are specific memories.   Even though he wraps himself in the darkness, he must be close to the light in order to survive.   The light, or goodness, gives him hope to carry on in a life that he cannot even successfully leave. The next character is the young waiter who must have the light.   He has not lived long, has a wife, and children.   Because his life seems to be exactly where it should be things are good and that is represented by the clean light of the bar.   Because of his youth, there has not been time for messes or losses.   He fears the shadows that shroud the elderly man because he sees them as foreshadows of his own life that he does not want to face. â€Å"He’ll stay all night,† he said to his colleague. â€Å"I’m sleepy now. I never get into bed before three o’clock. He should have killed himself last week.† (Hemingway) The last is the older waiter.   This man has experienced enough life that he, like the elderly gentleman, prefers the dark.   He sees the light as only something to illuminate the defects in life.   The light is very bright and pleasant but the bar is unpolished,† the waiter. said. (Hemingway)   This way feels that understands that he has more in common with the elderly man in the shadows, but he longs to be back in the light. â€Å"I am of those who like to stay late at the cafe,† the older waiter said. â€Å"With all those who do not want to go to bed. With all those who need a light for the night.† (Hemingway) 3. Hemingway uses A Clean Well-Lighted Place to ponder the meaning of life.   Life is lived and through the journey, individuals know the joy which leave them with a lack of understanding of others like the young waiter and the elderly man.   â€Å"You should have killed yourself last week,† he said to the deaf man. The old man motioned with his finger. (Hemingway) Only those who are satisfied with life should be around him.   Money is not what makes people happy. The elderly man has money, but still he tries unsuccessfully to committee suicide.   Hemingway was well into his career at this time and had plenty of money yet he was not happy.   He adds the quick glimpse of the girl and the soldier who brave the fear of getting caught for the sake of love or the physical part of love to show that there are things that are meaningful in life that are worth the risk.   Yet in the end people are left with their shadows of memories that are so painful that they either desire for nothing but to turn back to the light part of their lives or to desire to leave life.

Separation Between Religion And Schools - 875 Words

Back in grade school, the day was started every morning with little hands over little hearts as the pledge of allegiance was recited by a bunch of little voices. There was a time where â€Å"Under God† was just as fluent to a child as saying â€Å"Can I have†¦Ã¢â‚¬  while in a store or â€Å"I don’t want to† when asked to clean their room. Every attempt at removing the reference to God within the pledge of allegiance has failed so far but some schools have made changes accordingly without the laws changing. However, within the school system I attended, they just stopped reciting it all together in order to avoid future conflicts. More and more over the years the battle of separating church from state has been a leading controversy. But what’s the big deal? What makes this separation between religion and schools so important? These are questions that have fueled the fire behind the battle and continues to help keep a flame. By separating church from state, it is teaching respect for diversity and allowing religious freedom that has been a part of the nation’s legacy for so long. By definition religion is a â€Å"specific fundamental set of beliefs and practices generally agreed upon by a number of persons or sects† (Dictionary.com, 2014). Although there are many religions that are more popular and larger than some, the actual possibilities of a specific religion are endless. Not every religion believes in a â€Å"God†, such as Allah to Muslims or the multiple Gods and Goddesses of Hindus, so by havingShow MoreRelated Separation of Church and State is Necessary for Freedom of Choice855 Words   |  4 PagesSeparation of Church and State is Necessary for Freedom of Choice We in America have the right to be free, so why not listen to the words of Thomas Jefferson and build a â€Å"wall of separation between church and state?†Ã‚   The wall of separation was Jefferson’s interpretation of the first amendment; however, the idea was actually founder of Rhode Island Roger Williams’.   Jefferson’s belief was that religion was a personal relationship strictly between a man and his God and the government should notRead MoreThe Lack of Separation of Church and State is an Attack on Americas Ideals1350 Words   |  6 Pagesyet to make this dream a reality. Government threatens the policy of separation of church and state in schools everyday. 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Judgment on the legality of the Separation of Church and State should not be based on one’s religion. The phrase â€Å"Separation of church and state† sometimes known as â€Å"wall of separation between church and state†, is a phrase used by Thomas Jefferson in understanding the two clauses of the First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States: Establishment Clause and the Free Exercise Clause. The public education system